Latest Update: September 7, 2001 by Ben Marcus

16:00 ALASKA TIME PAYDAY SEPTEMBER 7, 2001 BEAR PAW RESORT

Got to get out of here and go pick up my big sweet paycheck from Nautilus Foods. No idea how much it will be, but it has to last me a while. Gus also owes me $160 and I should probably tape- record his excuses for not paying me back.

Spent the day in the warm, quiet Bear Paw RV park office online chasing this and that. Called the Coast Guard in the morning to talk them out of a boat, but they were doing Search and Rescue and couldn't talk.

Spoke with Derek Agnew at AK Super Station and he put me in touch with the woman who will be producing the show for local Alaska news. Lebreton, her last name is.

Went to the local dump and sorted out the van. Tried on a bunch of Patagonia swag and cleaned up. The van smells like fish and cat and yuck, but that's Alaska.

Went by Nautilus around 15:00 to see about paychecks. They'll be ready at 16:00, which is right about now. I prefer this warm, dead quiet RV office to that noisy, stinky, freezing cold and soggy fish plant. That work sucks, but I'm glad I did it. It's nice to be just working after doing nothing for so long. Now we'll see if it paid at all.

That money has to last me for a good long while, and I don't think it will. The wolf is definitely at the door and I need to dig myself out of all this.

I sent a chipper e-mail to Andy Marker at Patagonia today, being thankful and apologetic at the same time:

Andy

I picked up my surprisingly small box from Patagonia at the Fed Ex office in Anchorage a few days ago.

I thought, "How can all that high quality swag fit in there? There must be some mistake."

And then I opened that box and all that incredibly good Patagonia equipment came popping out, like clowns out of a circus car.

Patagonia is the best. When I put on a fishing vest or a deep wading jacket, I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor putting on a mink stole.

When I put on those wading boots, Imelda Marcos spins in her chair.

It fits, it's perfectly designed, it will last forever and It Just Rules.

Now I feel guilty, because I cancelled the Russia trip because those guys didn't have their acts together, and I didn't feel too good about traveling to the Evil Empire with a bunch of XXXXXXXXXX dingalings.

I ain't going to the Gulag for Flea Virostko.

I'm going to try to make it up to you by getting a photo of Colin Brown or Mark Alfaro riding the Turnagain Arm Tidal Bore on my Patagonia longboard.

If that makes the catalogue, I won't feel as bad (about feeling so good).

Thanks for all your help. I'm sorry it all blew up, but I tried my best.

I am using this Tidal Bore attempt as a Guinea Pig for bigger ideas: A BORED! TV show and a big snowboard/surf party this summer.

I have attached the Party Proposal. What do you think?

I think a thousand people lining the highway, screaming at the oceanic gladiator pit going on below them would be worth seeing.

I'll also forward some recent MPEGS of the bore.

Ben

So that was nice. Hopefully it will assuage his anger and my guilt.

What else? Lots of e-mails. One from a Sacklunch supporter who wondered how Shanti responded to all of my e-mail threats.

Gotta go get my paycheck and deposit it. Drum roll to see how much it is.

12:38 ALASKA TIME SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 8, 2001 DINING ROOM AT NAUTILUS FOODS

Another day, another $36 made, and probably $20 spent on AOL 800 time. Oh well. I'm in the dining room by myself, wearing the crazed Vietnam vet green jacket. I'm not as cold and wet as usual, but I'm cold and wet.

Did about 6 hours of processing today, mostly on the good line but also on the bad line when the hydraulics on the good line's decapitator failed. They futzed with it and at one point one of the hoses went off like a crazed snake. They couldn't fix it, so they switched us over to the ñrotating knivesî machine. My job was to take the fish after they were beheaded and cut a slit in the neck to free up all the guttie wutties, before Mexican Bob fed them head-first into the conveyor belt through the rotating knives.

So that was fun. Bug Eyed Boss Fella got mad at me again and threatened to fire me at dinner, because I wasn't putting in a full day. Good thing my little thought bubble wasn't visible over my head. Something about shooting Mexicans with a ñgolf gun.î

Two cops are standing over a dead body.

First cop says, ñThat there's a good Mexican. Good and dead.î

Second cop says, ñI think he was shot with a golf gun.î

First cop says, ñGolf gun! Why do you say that?î

Second cop says, ñWell it sure put a hole in Juan!î

Not a funny or nice joke, but that's what I was thinking as Bug Eyed Boss Fella bellowed at me with his speeded-up eyes.

Got my check and it was for around $275, but that was for three days of work or so. I think there is more coming. I could be earning a lot more, but I just can't do that work all day. It's too boring and tedious and loud and stinky, and I have other things that need to get done.

Today I spent most of the day at the Bear Paw, accomplishing not a whole lot. Let me look at the list of e-mails and maybe that will tell me something.

Just for the hell of it, I'll list all the e-mails I sent today, to give you some of the flava.

Scretadmer@AOL.com asked, ñCaught Inside. Who the hell wrote that?î

I answered: ñDan Duane. Who are you?î

Jgallanos@XXXXX Said my Bore-O-Cross idea was weird and eccentric but it would fit right in with Alaska, as would I.

I answered, ñThank you. Who are you?î

Here was my exchange with MarcusWisdorf who, like Jgallanos@XXXXX is a Turnagain Arm resident:

Ben,

You're right, it is a free world and so here's my opinion about your

production at the turnagain arm bore wave. It's a silly idea.

YOU MEAN THE TIDALCROSS THING? OF COURSE IT'S SILLY,THAT'S THE POINT.

So much money being spent on a trivial pursuit.

WOULDNT BE MUCH MONEY. NOT MUCH MONEY AT ALL MOST LIKELY.

Give the money to the surfrider foundation instead, of some hungry kids. If a jet ski is seen out there it will probably bring more who don't have safety as a consideration.

NO JET SKIS. THEY AREN'T LEGAL OUT THERE AND THERE IS NOWHERE TO LAUNCH THEM.

Look at Alaska's snowmachine/avalanche incidents for a precedence.

ALASKANS ARE THE BIGGEST BUNCH OF MOTORHEADS I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE, SO YOU COULD BE RIGHT.

The borewave is slow and somewhat unpredictable,

IT HAS SOME OOMPH ON A FIVE STAR DAY, NO DOUBT ABOUT IT. AND IT IS ABSOLUTELY PREDICTABLE. THERE IS A CHART AT BIRD POINT THAT PREDICTS IT.

so it is good for beginners to use to practice balance, turning and catching a wave.

I DONT THINK IT'S A PLACE FOR BEGINNERS.

It is rarely over 2 to 3 feet on the face and mostly whitewater. It really doesn't bother me as much as others if you try it, but I think your pro's will be rather "bored" with the whole thing.

THAT'S WHAT I AM GOING TO FIND OUT. THE FIVE STAR DAYS I SAW WOULD BE A CHALLENGE TO ANY SURFER.

The reason you haven't seen any good surfer's out there is because the local "good surfers" don't think it's worth getting wet for.

PERHAPS YOU ARE RIGHT.

However, I personally feel the bore-wave is a unique phenomena.

IT DEFINITELY IS THAT.

and would like to watch a pro surfer make some turns on it.

IT WOULD BE EXCITING TO SEE SOMEONE GOOD RIDE IT THE WHOLE WAY.

I think Alaska is a place that is very special and hope that you enjoy and respect.

I THINK I HAVE BEEN, SO FAR.

HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT ALL OF THIS, ANYWAY?

THANKS FOR THE E-MAIL. I LIKE GETTING THEM.

I WON'T BE DISRESPECTING ANYTHING, I JUST THINK THE TIDALCROSS DEAL WOULD BE A GOOD EXCUSE FOR A BIG PARTY.

NOTHING WRONG WITH PARTIES.

thank's Marc

Amclester@???? Told me that his copy of FIN still hadn't arrived. That is atrociously bad, Third World quality service by the US Postal Service.

Today I Express mailed a copy of FIN to Benny from Aggroville. He's an even-headed guy and I hope he reads it. Any Bay Area denizen will like it, I think. It's San Francisco-centric.

One_dubsc@???? Is a 19 year old girl in Hollister I exchange IM's with. I'm surprised she hasn't called the cops on me yet. But every time I talk to her I think of Strangers on the Internet. Maybe I'll head back to the Bay Area and write that thing. It could do well.

Here was the response from tide.predictions@NOAA.gov.

Mr. Marcus,

As is noted in the Frequently Asked Questions section of our web site, we cannot provide tide predictions for more than a single month via e-mail.

OOPS. MISSED THAT. IF YOU COULD SEND ME MAY 2002 VIA E-MAIL, I WOULD BE INFERNALLY GRATEFUL

All other requests are generated on a calendar year basis, and are subject to a $35 fee.

THAT MIGHT BE WORTHWHILE, TOO. I AM PUTTING TOGETHER A PROPOSAL FOR A WEIRD TIDAL-BORE SURFING EVENT IN ALASKA, AND I NEED THE TIDES TO PICK THE DAYS.

I HAVE ATTACHED THE PROPOSAL

There is another option, during October, the Tide Predictions provided on our web site are updated to include all of the next year. Thus, the tide predictions for all of 2002 will be available from our web site next month. Unless you need to have the predictions immediately, you may want to consider simply waiting until the first part of next month and accessing the data from our web site.

We will hold your request until we hear back from you.

WELL, IF YOU CAN SEND MAY 2002 BY E-MAIL I'D BE VERY HAPPY.

AND I MAY JUST PAY THE $35 FOR THE WHOLE YEAR BECAUSE I'M GOING TO ANCHORAGE ON SEPTEMBER 15 TO DO A TEST RUN OF THIS WAVE, AND I'M GOING TO PRESENT THE PROPOSAL THAT IS ATTACHED TO THE ALYESKA PRINCE HOTEL.

SO, I GUESS I DO NEED IT ASAP.

IS IT POSSIBLE TO SEND:

APRIL 2002 BY E-MAIL?

MAY 2002 BY E-MAIL?

JUNE 2002 BY E-MAIL?

Today a NOAA survey ship called The Rainier pulled up at the dock near the processing plant. I talked with one of the deckhands named Steve Larkspur, or something like that. It was a big, 230-foot boat with lots of little patrol boats attached to it for surveys. There were also kayaks and dirt bikes and a PWC just for the personal use of the crew and it's making me think the government is loose up here.

The Coast Guard weren't loose, though. I called USCG HQ in Juneau and asked if they might see there way to loan us an inflatable and a crew for the shoot at Turnagain Arm.

But indeed they could not see their way clear.

There isn't even a USCG station in Anchorage. Believe it or not there are only two Coast Guard stations in all of Alaska: One in Juneau and one somewhere else. Ketchikan, maybe. There isn't one in Valdez or Homer or Anchorage or anywhere that I have seen.

The Coasties must be jumping here all the time. Boats are constantly getting into trouble. A 130-foot tender hit a rock in Prince William Sound about a month ago and went down with 35,000 gallons of diesel on board.

And people are still talking about the Arctic Rose, a boat that went down in the Bering Sea with all hands last year. Fifteen men died and they have no idea what happened.

Last night I volunteered my bunk to a guy from Eureka who had just gotten off a 42 foot fishing boat, and was glad to be off. He got 8 per cent of the boat's profits, but he doesn't think he made much money.

He did say that bombing around in Prince William Sound was awesome under good weather, but that fishing is always dangerous, often uncomfortable and not always profitable.

I think it was when I was transferring my stuff from the bunk to the upstairs TV room that I lost my beloved tortoise-shell Maui Jim sunglasses. Today I can't find them. I was so groggy last night that I might have left them in my Patagonia jacket when I put it in the dryer. Maybe I left them in the TV room this morning when I cleared out in a hurry. Shit. I think they're gone, unless they are in the van somewhere.

This place is costing me a fortune. Oh well, I'll chuckle at all this when I am on the Oscar Podium. ñLife is just excruciating,î I'll say as I accept the Oscar. The trick is to make it pay off.

The guy who calls himself ñBennyî on Aggroville sent me an e-mail about the guy who calls himself ñDingz.î This guy is my latest anonymous cyber-heckler. He has been giving me shit for months on that thing, and I was very curious to find out who he was, so I could stick a shotgun up his behind when I get back to California.

Turns out he is a guy named Craig Wollan. He works somewhere in Silicon Valley. If anyone knows him, spit in his French Fries, would you please?

This is what Benny had to say about Dingz.

In a message dated 9/6/01 4:02:11 PM Pacific Daylight Time, TheBenM writes:

wwollan@citilink.net, colinbrown@earthlink.net

Are these the same person? Are they Dingz? I dislike Dingz immensely.

I'M PRETTY SURE THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON.

HE MADE A MISTAKE BY EXPOSING HIMSELF.

I'LL BE IN CALIFORNIA EVENTUALLY WITH ALL MY MONTANA GOODIES.

Total blowhard jackass. Never even surfed.

REALLY? THAT FIGURES. IN A WORLD FULL OF ANONYMOUS SIDELINE GROUPIE WANNABE DIPSHITS, HE'S NUMBER ONE.

JUST A SILICON VALLEY CUBICLE JOCKEY, VAGUELY AWARE THAT EVERYTHING THAT IS IMPORTANT IN THE WORLD IS GOING BY 100 MILES OVER HIS HEAD.

Just a surfing-internet groupie. Geev 'em brah.

HAVEN'T HEARD BACK FROM HIM YET.

HE'S TOO BUSY CLEANING TOILETS IN SILICON VALLEY, OR WHATEVER SHITHOLE HE IS IN.

Ben

I'LL MAIL THE SCREENPLAY. THE MAIL SERVICE HERE IS AMAZINGLY SLOW.

IT JUST TOOK TWO WEEKS FOR THE LAST BATCH TO GET FROM FAIRBANKS TO CALIFORNIA.

BAD.

I MAY HAVE YOU PASS IT ON TO SOMEONE WHEN YOU ARE DONE.

JUST LOOKING FOR INPUT AND INFO AND TO SEE IF ANYONE LIKES IT.

CURRENTLY READING IT, AND THEN PASSING IT ON:

SHAUN TOMSON TO WHOEVER
SCOT ANDERSON TO DALE WEBSTER
SHAWN SHAMLOU TO CRAIG HOSHIDE
ANDREW MCLESTER TO CHUCK GALLAGHER
JIM DEVLIN TO TITUS KINIMAKA
DARRACH BOURKE TO SUSAN RICHTER AT CNN (I HOPE)
KAREN GALLAGHER TO RANDY RARICK
BOB GREEN TO SHAWN ALLADIO
JODY HELZER OF SHARKTV
MARKLYN RETZER

Mark Alfaro has been sending me nearly as many e-mails as I send everyone else. He wants to know details about the bore. There isn't much I can tell him.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 10:03:20 AM Pacific Daylight Time, mark@7thwavecom.com writes:

Sounds like the wave itself- at least according to Shawn's guesstimate- shouldn't be that gnarly. Only one way to really find out- to throw two guinea pigs in front of the thing! :-D I

T HAS MOMENTS OF SEMI-GNARLINESS, BUT IT'S A LOT SAFER THAN MAVERICKS, UNLESS YOU GET RAMMED BY A BELUGA WHALE, WHICH COULD HAPPEN.

SEE YOU SOON. COULD BE FUN.

BEN

I had been intending to send an e-mail to Malcolm Gault-Williams and Gary Lynch looking for Santa Cruz information.

When they sent me one, I sent them this back.

Malcolm and Gary

I am writing a 12,000-word article on Santa Cruz for Steve Pezman and am looking for input from any where I can get it.

Specifically, I'm going to write about the Hawaiian Princes surfing the Rivermouth in the late 1800's, and I'd like to hear an educated guess from someone on what kind of boards they were riding: olo, alaia, paipo?

Also I am ready and willing to hear input from anyone who wants to chime in about Santa Cruz-insider or outsider.

Thanks.

In Valdez, Alaska now, working in the worst fish processing plant in the state, or so I am told.

Going to do the tidal bore thing on September 15 with a couple of guys from Santa Cruz.

See attached for the Grand Design. Could be fun.

Ben

Colin Brown is the other surfer coming to Alaska. He's a lawyer who I use as the model for Jay Dagget.

By the way, Jay Dagget is a play on J. Noble Dagget, the lawyer Kim Darby is always talking about in True Grit. ñShe pulls that J. Noble Dagget character like a six gun,î John Wayne growls in the movie. I use Jay Dagget when I want to bluff people. It kind of worked with Frank, although I'm getting slagged on Aggroville again by the Silicon Valley Wannabe Sewing Circle. I'll have to think of something else for Frank, maybe one of those 12 gauge rifled slugs. That would slow him down a little. Maybe

Here is Colin's reaction to my Jay Dagget letter to Shanti.

In a message dated 9/6/2001 8:23:09 PM Pacific Daylight Time, colinbrown@earthlink.net writes:

Hey BenM,

Trip sounds good and interesting.

I THINK IT WILL BE OKAY. YOU'RE GOING TO BE ON TV, YOU KNOW. SURFING AND BEING INTERVIEWED AND WE'LL BE ABLE TO WATCH THE WHOLE DEAL ON THE SHOW AFTER MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL, FROM THE BAR OF THE ALYEKSA PRINCE HOTEL Y

our Jay Daggett piece is offensive because it's a bullshit bluff.

OH WELL. THEY AREN'T DOING THE MAGAZINE.

Other than that, I'm sorry they ripped off your idea.

THEY KIND OF DID.

I don't know if you have a non- frivolous cause of action, but I am assuming you could sue in quantum meruit on a quasi-contract theory. Maybe you should let sleeping scumbags lie.

I LOVE IT WHEN YOU TALK LEGAL-ESE. I GET SO... EXCITED.

I'LL LET IT DROP, BUT I WAS PISSED.

Your imitation surf mag was hilarious.

EVERYONE ELSE THINKS SO, TOO. THAT WAS NOT MY INTENTION.

CHRIS MAURO LOVED IT. HE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO.

It's a shame you had to give it away now, to show your hand.

THAT WAS A BLUFF, TOO, BUT PEOPLE ARE SO DUMB, THEY'RE PROBABLY SCANING THE TRADE SHOW TO SEE IF IT SHOWS UP.

THE THING ABOUT STANFORD IS TRUE.

And that you aren't channeling your satirical wit in a profit making vein.

WELL I AM. THE SURFER'S JOURNAL THING WILL MAKE ME SOME DOUGH.

It's totally defamatory, as you know.

THAT WAS THE POINT.

BRING HIM ON. CAN'T SUE A GUY WHO IS BROKE.

SEE YOU IN A WEEK.

WHAT TIME DO YOU GET IN? I'LL COME AND GET YOU.

I'M NOT LIVING RIGHT. HOPE I LIVE THAT LONG.

Regards, Colin

Colin Brown is a smart guy and a good guy and I'm glad he is coming to Alaska. I am very curious to see what these guys do with this wave. I think Colin and Mark are both very good surfers. They could be the Guinea Pigs for bigger things.

If we do the BoarderCross idea, the trophies should be shaped like Beluga Whales.

A while ago I had sent an e-mail to a woman in Canada who runs Rafting Canada, asking about the Shubencadie Tidal Bore.

She responded.

In a message dated 9/6/2001 8:12:02 PM Pacific Daylight Time, river.runners@ns.sympatico.ca writes:

Hi Ben,

I still was not able to open the attachment,

HMMMM. IS IT BECAUSE IT WASN'T WRITTEN IN FRENCH?

HAHAHAHAH

CANADIAN JOKE. SORRY.

but I will try to answer some of your questions.

THANK YOU.

Tide times for this area are on my website at www.tidalborerafting.com

THANK YOU.

this are actually bore times. Closes motels would be in the town of Truro, about 30 minutes away, depending on the time of year and the size of your group there is several B&B's in the area.

SOUNDS GOOD. THANK YOU. As for weather online I am not sure. When is the bore the best to surf will depend on the moon phases and time of year. My husband would be the best one to ask. I WILL ASK HIM IF THIS THING GETS ROLLING.

When and if it looks like you want to make the trip here I would suggest you call him to see when the conditions would be best.

WILL DO. THANK YOU.

Good luck,

Right now there is a drunk guy in the Dining Room complaining about Nautilus Foods, saying it is the shittiest fish processor in Alaska. He looks a bit like Jim Varney and he is drunk. Never a good combination. Everyone here is either a drunk or a Mexican or a Turk, for whom working all summer in absolute shit for $1000 a week is a good deal.

Why am I here? I am none of the above. I'm a writer. I'M AN ARTIST, DAMNIT!

I love getting yelled at by the Bug Eyed Boss Fella and being frozen and cold and sore for $6 an hour. When you see me smiling quietly to myself on the podium at the Oscars, you will understand why.

I got an e-mail from Scot Anderson, the Marine Biologist responsible for all that ñflying white sharkî footage from the Farallon Islands.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 11:36:35 AM Pacific Daylight Time, sharkman1137@mac.com writes:

Hi Ben,

No, I have not gotten it yet but I am waiting.

LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR OPINION, AND WHETHER THE OPENING SEQUENCE WOULD BE EASY TO FILM FOR THE BIG SCREEN.

THIS MOVIE OPENS WITH A BANG, AND I THINK YOU KNOW THE BANG I'M TALKING ABOUT.

WAS IT YOU WHO DID ALL THE SURFBOARD-CAMERA CINEMATOGRAPHY?

YOU'RE A BASTARD. THAT STUFF IS EVIL. GREAT, BUT EVIL.

Alaska, Iv been fishing up there for the past 4 summers, great!

WHERE DO YOU FISH? I'M IN VALDEZ RIGHT NOW AND LAST NIGHT I TALKED TO A GUY WHO HAD BEEN OUT ON A 42-FOOT BOAT IN PRINCE WILLIAM SOUND. I'M DYING TO GET OUT THERE AND POKE AROUND. MUT BE AWESOME.

IT WAS MAPS OF ALASKA THAT PARTIALLY INSPIRED THE SHARK MOVIE.

ONE OF THE QUESTIONS IT ASKS IS: CAN A MAN IN A SAILBOAT DISAPPEAR IN THE MODERN WORLD, IF HE WANTS TO?

MASON THORPE FINDS OUT THAT IT'S NOT AS EASY AS HE THINKS.

My home adress:
Scot Anderson
P O Box 390
Inverness, CA 94937
(415) 669-1077

IT'S ON ITS WAY.THE MAIL SERVICE IN ALASKA IS AMAZINGLY SLOW. I MAILED IT AUGUST 23 AND SOME GUYS ARE JUST GETTING THERES.

I THINK THEY SEND THE MAIL BY MIGRATING SALMON.

THANKS AGAIN FOR TAKING THE TIME. VERY MUCH LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR INPUT.

I am looking forward to Scot Anderson's input. If by some miracle this movie gets made, Scot is going to be our man in the Farallons, making sure that ñbig bangî opener is filmed correctly.

Here is more from Marcus Wisdorf.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 11:41:30 AM Pacific Daylight Time, marcuswisdorf@hotmail.com writes:

Ben,

I surf the bore regularly and heard about it down at the parking area from both John Markel and Darby Hobson.... glad to hear no jetski's

MY THING WITH THE JET SKIS WAS WATER SAFETY AND TRANSPORTING THE GUYS FROM BIRD POINT DOWN TO THE FIRST PARKING LOT, THAT'S ALL.

I KNOW THE THINGS ARE STINKY. I JUST WROTE A BIG ARTICLE IN THE SURFER'S JOURNAL ABOUT THEM.

NOW I'M WORKING ON THE COAST GUARD TO USE ONE OF THEIR INFLATABLES FOR CAMERA PLATFORM AND CATCHING THE THING WAY UP AT THE TOP.

HOPE WE AREN'T PISSING ANYONE OFF. NOT OUR INTENTION.

ONLY TWO GUYS ARE COMING FROM CALIFORNIA.

ABC ALASKA IS GOING TO SHOOT IT.

ARE YOU GOING OUT TO THE HINCHINBROOK THING?

Marc

This is an angry e-mail from the 19-year-old gal in Hollister.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 11:53:07 AM Pacific Daylight Time, one_dubsc@????.com writes:

Funny, you were just online. Did you IM me? No.

STOP ACTING LIKE A 19-YEAR-OLD

This just goes to show what a hypocrite you are. And I can't believe you never had me on your list to begin with.

YOU ALWAYS IMed ME. I NEVER HAD TO DO IT TO YOU, AND MY MEMORY IS FAILING ME. SIGN OF AGE.

I think she was angry.

Today I called a photographer named Duane Watts, who was recommended by John Markel. He was in Portland when I found him and said that the first guy I called, Calvin Hall, was the best guy for the job.

Jgallanos@??? Had mentioned something about a surf festival going on that same weekend we will be doing the tidal bore thing.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 11:12:34 AM Pacific Daylight Time, jgallanos@yahoo.com writes:

The festival is Sept 13-16th. Davis Parsons...a.k.a. AK surfboards is one of the guys who is organizing the event and Points North Heli Adventures.

I SEE. SOUNDS INTERESTING, BUT THAT'S THE SAME WEEKEND THE TIDAL BORE THING WILL BE GOING ON, SO I'LL BE IN GIRDWOOD.

THAT'S GOOD, IN A WAY, BECAUSE WE WON'T BE GETTING IN ANYONE'S WAY.

is phone # is XXX-3524 or cicdv@XXX.net. Or on the web at Surfalaska.com Everyone is to meet at Orca lodge in Cordova on Wednesday night.

THANK YOU.

They are hooking people up to bush planes for $150 unless you can charter something by boat. Another option is to contact Mike Alvarez at Freeznsurf@hotmail.com.

I MAY CALL ALL THESE GUYS IF I WRITE THE THING FOR ALASKAN AIRLINES.

He and a few surfers are planning to arrive on Friday and boat over if they can find someone to shuttle them over. Or check to see if Liska is going out of Seward.

LOOKS LIKE I'M GOING TO MISS BOTH EVENTS: MONTAGU AND HINCHINBROOK. OH WELL. WISH I'D SEEN THEM. THE TIDAL BORE THING SHOULD BE INTERESTING.

THANKS FOR THE INFO.

The Grader Guy just came in and said that he saw a notice in the paper about someone finding a bunch of CDs in a garbage bag at the Tesoro Station. They are now with the police. I'm going there first thing tomorrow. I hope I get some of my DVDs back, but what I really want is my Final Draft software disc. I thought up a scene tonight involving that erotic, samurai knot-tying by Takashi Remora and I want to write it down. But I don't have that disc, so I can't.

That was very nice of the Grader Guy. I offered him some reward money, but he said he was glad to help. See? Do nice things for people and sometimes they do nice things for you.

That could be good news. I should have filed a police report in the first place. Dumb.

I had been in contact with the editors of the Alaskan/Horizon Air magazines about writing article for Canada and Alaska. Today I pushed it again.

Michele Dill
Paradigm Publishing

Sept. 7, 2001

Michele

I'm in Valdez, Alaska right now, preparing for this weird attempt-to-surf-a-tidal-bore expedition from September 15 - 18.

I've been poking around Alaska taking photos and talking to people and I think I have enough information for a good feature on Surfing Alaska.

In September there are two surfing events taking place on the outside of the islands that form Prince William Sound. I won't make it to either one because of my project, but I could talk to people who did go.

I even have some goofy photos. See attached.

Do you think you are interested in this story?

I should be able to find quality surfing photos from Turnagain Arm, Montagu Island, Hinchinbrook Island, Yakutat and elsewhere

The story can be any length.

Ben

And I sent an e-mail to Jeff Girard and Scott Hulet about that Santa Cruz article. And also suggested they use the glossary of Santa Cruz terms I did for swell.com

Scott Hulet
Jeff Girard

I think I changed the title to the Santa Cruz piece last night while cutting fish.

Instead of "Surf City," I think the title should be a variation on:

www.SantaCruz.com

www.SantaCruz.inc

www.SurfCity.com

www.SurfCity.inc

Something like that. You can get all tech with the design, if you want.

Still working on it.

The link for that Santa Cruz glossary is:http://www.swell.com/sw/content/travel/
surfmaps/us/sanfrancisco_monterey/
theharbor_glossary.jsp

Dale Webster wondered what my ñSurf Industry Spoof' was all about and asked me to send it. I did, but he couldn't open the file.

I found Calvin Hall's website and sent him an e-mail about the Tidal Bore attempt.

Calvin Hall
Alaska

Sept. 7, 2001

Calvin

I have been traveling through Alaska for the last month or so and have invited a couple of California surfers to come up to Turnagain Arm to give the tidal bore a go.

The Surfer's Journal wants to run a piece on the tidal bore there, and have left it to me to arrange a photographer.

You were recommended by John Markel and Duane Watts.

The surfers are Mark Alfaro and Colin Brown, and I am hoping they have the ability to really do that wave justice.

I want to see someone go the distance on that freakish little wave, with speed and style, from the First Parking Lot to the Third Parking Lot.

I have also arranged with Derek Agnew at ABC Alaska to cover the attempt, and he is going to put it on his post-Monday Night Football show.

Mark and Colin will be arriving the 15th of September, and they will stay until Wednesday the 18th. There is a progression of Three, Four and Five Star bore days, as rated by the chart at Bird Point.

They'll be staying Girdwood Condos for the first two nights, then the Alyeska Prince has offered us rooms at $80 a night, which was very nice of them.

I'm hoping these guys will get it wired on the first two days, and ride it the distance on Monday.

We shall see.

I was hoping to get a PWC Rescue driver named Shawn Alladio up here to do water patrol, but John Markel shot that idea down.

He's right, but I was thinking safety.

Now I'm trying to talk the Coast Guard into sending down their best small-boat drivers and a hard-bottomed inflatable. I hope to use the boat as a camera platform, and also as a shuttle.

I'm thinking these guys will use the boat to get up to Bird Point and ride the bore as far up around Bird Point as they can, until it backs off in deep water.

Then the boat will take them to the First Parking Lot, drop them off and let them paddle into the wave. If they do it right, they can ride the bore for two miles, from the First Parking Lot to the Third.

It would be nice if the boat could stay behind them in case someone falls, and put the surfer back in front of the wave.

Not sure if that's possible, but it would be good training for the Coasties, anyway.

Let me know if you are interested in any of this.

I think the Turnagain Arm bore is pretty cool, and I have two devious plans to blow this Guinea Pig attempt into something bigger:

An annual snowboard/tidal bore riding event at the Alyeska Prince Hotel.

And

An adventure TV series called BORED!

Let me know if you are interested in shooting these days from September 15 - 18.

Could be fun, and The Surfer's Journal is a high-quality, prestigious publication to have your photos displayed.

I'll talk to them about buy outs if you are interested.

And if I can sell this story somewhere else-Alaska Airlines are interested-there might be buy outs there, too.

Patagonia gave me a whole bunch of equipment for an aborted trip to Russia. I'd love to get them a photo of someone riding my Patagonia longboard for their catalogue.

Let me know ASAP, please.

This could be fun. Pray for sun.

Ben

He responded.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 4:01:59 PM Pacific Daylight Time, challak@alaska.net writes:

Thanks for the e-mail Ben, I tried to send you one this morning but I got your address wrong.

OH WELL.

I am interested but I need to know more about the financial end of it.

YOU SHOULD CONTACT JEFF DIVINE OR SCOTT HULET AT THE SURFER'S JOURNAL AND THEY'LL TELL YOU THEIR BUY OUTS AND ALL LIKE THAT THERE.

SCOTT@SURFERSJOURNAL.COM

JEFF@SURFERSJOURNAL.COM

AND THERE IS ALSO THE POTENTIAL FOR PATAGONIA AND ALASKA AIRLINES, BUT THAT'S ALL TENTATIVE

If you don't catch me at home you could try my cell which is (907)230-4500

WILL DO. THANKS.

KNOW ANYONE WITH AN INFLATABLE?

BEN

Thanks,

Calvin

I sent Mark Alfaro some MPEGS that I took of the Three Star day with the Turks.

He liked it.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 2:49:57 PM Pacific Daylight Time, mark@7thwavecom.com writes:

How big is that wave "Appealing left?"

EIGHT INCHES

Are those black dots people?

YES

Rider up closeout looks like a chest high wall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CLOSE ENOUGH.

What star is that sucker????

ONLY A THREE STAR.

I'M TELLING YOU, A FIVE STAR IS LEGIT. IT'S GOT SOME RUMBLE.

IT'S EERIE, BORDERING ON SCARY BECAUSE

IT

JUST

KEEPS

GOING

Yeah! More! More!

YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET MORE MORE, WHEN YOU GET HERE.

Ha-ha!

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ENTHUSIASM

Thanks, Ben.

And then, Fan Mail from someone.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 3:15:31 PM Pacific Daylight Time, nwdan@northwave.com writes:

Hey Whats up,

Your journal keeps me entertained during my lunchhour, thanks.

I ENTERTAIN MYSELF BY WRITING IT AT LUNCHTIME.

I would recommend that you need to write in a different industry,

DO TELL?

I don't think the action sports industry will ever " have there shit completely together".

DID I SPELL "THERE" LIKE THAT? MAYBE I DON'T HAVE MY SHIT TOGETHER.

Also if you ever need a great photographer, there is this guy named Pat Wright, great photographer who has done work for a lot Pro riders, and action sports companys.

IS HE IN ALASKA?

If you can pay, he'll shoot... his email is

patwrightphoto@earthlink.net.

THANK YOU.

I think you should be writing for the outdoor industry--

I DON'T WANT TO WRITE AT ALL. I'M DONE WITH IT.I'M JUST DOING IT UNTIL I CAN FIGURE OUT SOMETHING ELSE.

I think the poeple in that industry most likely will have there shit more together, more organized, less cool guy attitudes etc,

THOSE COOL GUY ATTITUDES BUG ME. IT'S SUCH A CROCK.

you get the picture. The action sports industry is just " TO COOL" you know what I am trying to say right?

IT'S A CROCK OF SHIT. THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF OVERGROWN IMPRESSIONABLE TEENAGERS SELLING OVERPRICED CLOTHES TO IMPRESSIONABLE TEENAGERS.

I'LL ATTACH THE SPOOF I DID OF SURF NEWS.

THIS IS HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT ALL.

anyway, I check into sacklunch everyday, and get pissed when there is that 2-5 day break with no updates.

ME TOO.

Keep it up, for sure entertaining, can't wait to see what Shanti has to say!

anyway, I check into sacklunch everyday, and get pissed when there is that2-5 day break with no updates.

ME TOO.

I'LL FORWARD YOU OUR E-MAILS.

ATTACHED IS THE PHONY ISSUE OF SURF NEWS.

Then Mark Alfaro sent me another exuberant e-mail about the bore. Duane Watts had sent me a photo of a guy riding the bore with snow-capped mountains in the back.

In a message dated 9/7/2001 5:04:02 PM Pacific Daylight Time, mark@7thwavecom.com writes:

Ben, I'd be stoked to ride that thing! I want to short board it but I want to use the LB, too!

I THINK IT MIGHT ALMOST BE MORE OF A LONGBOARD WAVE THAN A SHORTBOARD WAVE, BUT WE SHALL SEE.

THIS IS GOING TO BE INTERESTING.

PRAY FOR FIVE-STAR WEATHER.

PRAY FOR A GOOD SHOT FOR THE PATAGONIA CATALOGUE

That shot of the surfer with the snow capped is amazing!

YES IT IS. THE WHOLE SET UP IS AMAZING. I THINK THAT IS WHY I AM DRAGGING YOU UP HERE.

I DOUBT YOU WILL REGRET IT.

CLEAR WEATHER. CLEAR WEATHER.

THAT IS YOUR NEW MANTRA.

I GOTTA GO PICK UP MY PAYCHECK AT THE FISH PROCESSING PLANT.

There were other e-mails. Matt Warshaw wondered how much Art Brewer weighed, but was embarrassed to ask him.

Mark Alfaro sent me an e-mail about ñRelay surfingî the Tidal Bore, in which surfers pick up different boards for different parts of the wave.

I just had a long conversation with the pretty-eyed Turk who talks like the Andy Kaufmann character from Taxi. He just finished and is going back to Turkey tomorrow. He is ñveddy veddy hippie to be leavingk.î He doesn't like America. Doesn't like Alaska. Doesn't like the Fish Plant. He wants to find an internship in Electrical Engineering. His girlfriend was here when he first arrived, but she didn't last. ñThis is no place for dames,î I offered.

ñYes, she is leavingk fast because this is not good for relationships,î he answered.

No indeed. He and all the Turks have been sleeping in tents across the street. They've been here since July, most of them, and most of them are itching to go home.

It looks like we'll be processing fish until Tuesday and then they're going to break this place down and pack it up.

I'm going to store all my stuff and take a bunch of people to Anchorage on Thursday. Might even make a little dough on the deal.

So it's 2:35 in the morning. Do I know where my cat is?

I don't. Haven't seen him all night.

My sunglasses are missing and hopefully fell off in the van last night and I will find them.

There is a glimmer of a chance that my DVDs are waiting for me at the police station. All I want is my Final Draft disc, dang it.

Gus gave me $100 of the $160 he owes me and now he is talking about going to Univik, up the Dalton Highway from Dawson City. Apparently there is a lot of work up there.

Not sure what I am going to do. I'll do the Tidal Bore thing and then get out of Alaska in a hurry. I'm looking forward to soaking up a little heat in Montana in the fall. Alaska is cold and wet, and it gets to you after awhile, even on a sunny day like today.

Tomorrow I'll go to the Bear Paw RV Park and I need to remember to take a photo of the people there. They are nice. They Like Ike.

Time to go check on the van and find Ike and then hit the sack.

This place sucks.